Have YOU ever asked yourself this question?
OR, perhaps
Just what IS my purpose/mission in this life?
Or simply,
Why was I even born?
I have been questioning these impossible mysteries with more confusion and uncertainty than should be humanly possible. Looking back on my life with all the various choices and decisions I have made, along with my aspirations and hopes for my future, only reinforces, then further complicates my search for any possible logical explanation out there somewhere. Mainly, because my original dreams are about as far away from reality, as we are from Pluto. Imagine comparing a pro basketball player to my actual reality, a writer still looking for a profitable niche.
Now, you see just how far Pluto is, don't you?
At least, my destiny is much clearer now. I no longer concern myself with seeking others for companionship or any socialization.
There is just NO one out there for me!
Even if there was, I have no desire to bring new life....
HERE!
Speaking for me anyway, the most important reason I will NEVER create any new life, is I would NEVER intentionally bring anyone here, only to force them to exist in the very same cold, cruel, deceptive and vile existence I am unfortunately forced to live in. I could NEVER be that cold and cruel. With me in this off the wall, evil, and beyond sinister world, by mistake, this is exactly why I really have NO clue or any idea at all what my purpose is here or what I am even supposed to be doing on this terrible planet.
Make sense?
If I was dropped off, or placed here inadvertently, perhaps my only mission is to go where I actually DO belong without wasting any more of my short time left down here.
Looking for life's purpose is so far beyond our capability, as its way too complex for us to finally find out, that the answer may actually take multiple existences to even come close to any answers.
Even with all that I have said, I actually do have a few potential explanations in mind.
More than a decade ago, when a scared little defenseless, abused little girl, came into my life, she just stole my heart! She was also more than precious, innocent, and so very loving, yet also very courageous and beyond brave soul! She, at the same time, really needed a completely loving home as well as a beyond patient and caring master. Taking ALL this under consideration, maybe I am to do nothing more than really give her ALL my eternal love I have within me that I possibly can. I will always be here for my precious adorable loving lil Mimi, my really sweet and always well behaved little fur daughter, so she ALWAYS has a safe loving home, where she is, and always will be, completely protected from ANY & ALL evil in this totally cruel insane malevolent existence. After she was so brutally abused with complete maliciousness by a vile heinous repulsive life form, for the 1st 5 years of her dismal and dejected life that she really never even deserved, I boldly stepped in without even a split 2nd thought and saved her life, no longer having to ever endure any further mental and physical abuse for the rest of her time down here!
When I saved her, her background just totally broke my heart and spirit.
It turns out that she, being the poor defenseless lil chi, she is, was not only abused, but then beyond all the demoralizing and humiliating totally deplorable years of beyond cruel abuse, the totally evil pitiful demon, only drove the final nail into her abhorrent and terrifying coffin, further. This was for her final annihilation, she also was left in a foreclosed home, most certainly to meet her frightening horrific demise. If she hadn't been found by some type of guardian angel's powerful watchful loving eye that saw she needed a miracle just in the nick of time, it just causes me unmeasurable pain and agony to even surmise her horrid destiny. To this very day, I just don't know, for the life of me, how some beyond abhorrent foul life form could ever conceivably do that or could even share the same existence as us! But as we all have been placed down here somehow in such an odious revolting and beyond insane world that will always retain its gruesome, warped and demented tight grip around all of us, and its vile sins against humanity with no peaceful end in sight, I can possibly see why, while its detestable and loathsome ways are just way beyond us.
This is the very pertinent reason, I wasn't even going to risk her ever, receiving anymore immoral, beyond vicious abuse anymore.
If I didn't welcome her into my loving empathetic life, then I could never bring myself into a peaceful place in my soul considering how her impending destiny could have turned out. She could have started the same vicious cycle all over again, with a new sinister evil demon.
Who knows?
It makes me wonder if I were to leave this miserable existence down here to go far away to a much more superior exceptional existence, and leave her behind, would this mean that I failed my mission in life?
On a much simpler lighter note, maybe I am just here to be a kind heart and loving soul to people whose lives I touch with my sincere heartfelt communication & well intentioned advice. Recently, I have been receiving kind and warm sentiments from those who actually give me a purpose for all my literature that I so diligently produce.
I am on a few websites where I reply to people's self-disparaging posts as they pour out their feelings reaching out, possibly for some help. I like to consider myself to be a decent guy, in my own opinion, anyway. But I could be way off.
It doesn't even have to be inside the internet world, it can also be in person as well. After all, when we interact with anyone, no matter how slight, our actions lead to different events in their now altered life. But since we all must now be in compliance while we all are forced to wear such ridiculous non-effective muzzles henceforth, this is impossible now.
Still yet another possibility, is that it is my destiny to impact this cold, cruel, & callous, not to forget beyond evil, world on a much grander scale.
Just Imagine!
It just might be in my future to actually become an advocate, or even more influential, an activist! After all, I am the ever-famous BiMaleNudist, on Twitter.
Yes, I am Bi and also a nudist.
Hence my title.
Any more questions?
Aside from fighting for a worthwhile cause impacting many people, then perhaps I will only impact a needy scared little child, which is a much more humane action, than bringing a brand new life into this world, being so cruel and vindictive to all its inhabitants.
I would much rather give of myself, in giving new and refreshed hope and re energized inspiration to a needy shy and reserved teen that really desires a knowledgeable caring adult that is beyond confident, that can instill this into the teen who really needs a loving dad to coach him on finding a way to somehow make it through this dismal life.
"Anything is possible."
It's one philosophy I truly live by.
Being BOTH bisexual AND a nudist, just those two unique attributes alone would give me 2 areas in which to fight for while project my blatant self-confidence for decades to come. Even more so, if I decide to fight for youth. They really need a strong adult to be by their side while also being right in their corner! Since nudists are the only minority in existence who have absolutely NO rights, this alone would be a lifelong battle. Especially as the whole world is, for the most part, against wearing the best suit on earth! The very one that we were born with.
WOW!
The possibilities are just beyond infinite!
Or perhaps, if none of these cards are in my deck, maybe I should just continue on my present course while I maintain my good nature with others, and hopefully, I will realize my mission, or purpose, in life when the time is right.
The best way for me to make it through life to the next step in my quite possible eternal journey, is by teaching myself how to stop hurting others in life that mean the world to me, and then acquire the proper knowledge where maybe I might actually attract good people towards me while I also, and most importantly, manage to keep them IN my life!
Time to take a deep breath now!
Its mind boggling to consider all these potential scenarios!
Love you BOTH,
Christopher
Comments